Tapas' Wisdom & Hannah's Courage

 

 Recently Tapas Fleming, creator of the Tapas Acupressure Technique (TAT) shared an intimate exchange between her and her college-aged daughter, Hannah.  Hannah gave her mom permission to share the conversation with the TAT community, and Tapas has given me permission to share it with you.  I think you will agree that everything about this conversation is extraordinary:  the openness of Hannah with her mom, Tapas's sweet wisdom to her daughter, and Hannah's openness to making such a private conversation public because of the good that could come from it.

Here's an excerpt:

Hannah texted me, “I’m just now feeling very very low about my body image.” 

After a few exchanges, she texted, “I’m still as fat as ever. And I’ve thus far been unable to make lasting change."

 

I asked, “How come no lasting change?" She wrote, "I guess because I’m addicted to sugar and fill voids in my life with  food.  ‘Cause I’m weak and dumb and can’t control myself."

 My heart went out to my baby girl.

I offered for her to call me and she did.   She told me how she thought, ”If I just would have started a year ago, I would be where I want to be.  I know what I’m supposed to do, I just don’t do it. I did TAT, but it didn't help and I feel bad about that.”

I told her, ”What you’re dealing with is really your mind and all your feelings and thoughts from your whole life. You know how every time you felt sad, angry, frustrated, lonely or hurt and ate to put yourself in a temporary food coma to deal with it -- it’s all still there unresolved.
"Then there’s all the stuff you were born into because of your ancestors -- like times they starved and whenever there was food around, they stuffed themselves with the feeling that they never knew when food would be there again. Certainly there was starving on my side, and on your dad’s side,
there’s the potato famine of Ireland. 

"Then there are all the emotions and thoughts from ancestors like being short tempered, angry and frustrated and eating to put yourself into a temporary coma just to get over it.  Until you really dissolve those things, part of yourself is willfully trying to do one thing (eat less) while another part is just as strongly pushing against the willful part (eat more). It’s you pushing against yourself: it’s exhausting. And if you let down your will, you’re right under all of it again.”  

“Yes, that’s just how it feels.”  (Here’s what I realized I hadn't before:) “What you’re dealing with isn't just over-eating, you’re really dealing with the mind and all its negativity plus your emotions. The food problems are just the outward manifestation. It's the spiritual path that everyone who's working on becoming more conscious deals with for their whole life -- you're just starting early.

"People who meditate, are into psychology, trying to be closer to God or really trying to achieve anything -- it’s all the same stuff they’re dealing with. You have to do it often and keep doing it -- it’s a lifelong process.” 

 “Oh -- you never explained this about TAT,” Hannah commented.  “I thought I was supposed to do it just a few times and verything was supposed to change...and I felt bad about it because it hadn't worked.”  

“Oh no -- it’s not like that. That would be like saying,‘I meditated a few times and I’m not enlightened. So it didn't work.’

“When I had cancer, I did a full TAT session around five times a week plus visualizing myself in radiant health while doing the TAT Pose almost daily for a year.

“If you have a trauma, a single incident, then usually one or two TAT sessions clears it up. But when you have a condition like a health problem or you’re trying to lose weight or accomplish something in your life, you have to keep doing TAT about all the mind stuff and emotions that continue to be there. You might want to think of your weight loss as a one or two year project. It could happen in less time, but you need to be kind and loving and patient with yourself.” 

 

Is this not an extraordinary conversation between mother and daughter?  For more information on the TAT protocol, including the step-by-step guide to doing TAT by yourself, go to www.tatlife.com.  Deepest thanks to Tapas – and especially to Hannah – for giving us all the benefit of your combined wisdom.   

If you’re interested in experiencing the grace of a session with a TAT Pro, please contact me so we can set up an appointment either in person or via Skype.